Apathy

Happy Saint Patrick's Day and happy birthday Mom!

I hope everyone is having a great day so far. And I hope today's word of wait doesn't cause discouragement or shame, but rather invokes change in your life.

So...today's word of wait is: apathy.

Think of this world and most people that you know that live in it, and live as a part of it. They are apathetic. They are bored. They fill their lives with things and substances they think will make them happy, only to finish their dose and begin to search for a new one.

I'm not saying there's not room for expansion, progression, or growth within any realm of any one person's life. I'm simply stating that as a person living in a college town, no longer affiliated with the college, I see a general lack of excitement in a lot of the lives of my generation. And being a part of the music industry (on amateur terms), I see a lot of apathy in the industry at all age and experience levels. People don't want to DO anything anymore. They don't want to go to a GREAT show if it's on a Sunday night. They don't want to save any part of the industry that's failing. They don't want to save themselves from failing. 

Why? Because society and the world has told us that the only true excitement comes when we fill ourselves with padding that is hollow at best. Love, affection, nurturing, and true joy - in my belief - comes from the nurturing of others. Make someone else smile. Put down and walk away from something that's hurting a friend. Love someone, not lust after someone.

People want the circumstances to weigh in their favor, but expect them to do so by happenings, by mere chance, and by simply waiting for those favors to fall in their laps. They expect people to know what to do; truly, what the people of this world need is a mentor. Everyone should have a figure that they look to for advice, counsel, or a model to live their life by - and to the positive extent.

Mine, if you read this blog enough you should know, is Jesus Christ. He is able to give strength, empowerment, and confidence to those who choose to be like he because He has overcome this world! How can you be bored by the world if the things in it don't matter to you?! Hah! Sounds so simple, yet difficult, right? 

"Clay, I live in this world. I need money. I need food. I need friends. I have to survive, and I'd rather not do it alone." I'm not saying go live beneath a cactus in the middle of Arizona and expect God to completely furnish your life with people who love you and plenty of food, water, and shelter (although, The Big Guy could). What I'm saying is set your sights higher. Think of the things, people, and bad circumstances of this world as filth that is lying in the gutter of today's society. Would you rather look down at garbage, or look towards a sky that is so unimaginably blue it's awe-inspiring?

I know my answer! And I'm exciting to have my eyes upward without my nose being so high that I'm afraid to look down to help someone up that has stumbled and fell. 

"Do you need a hand?" I ask. 

Give yourself substance. Put away mindless things and educate yourself, even if it's not of faith concern or nature. Teach someone how to live. Teach someone how to love and stop this madness of hate and snobbery spreading across generations. Invite others where ever you may go, and do it with a genuine heart. 

"I don't have time." 5 minutes is all it takes to brighten someone's day. A phone call, a short walk, a compliment, etc. Share the word of God with them - encourage them through His love, and not by damnation! 

*Ahem* I swear I haven't had any coffee today. 

Current Music: A Plea For Purging's "Depravity"; Track: "Misanthropy"

Repentance

Thanks for checking in, it's a blessing to have you here.

Today's word of wait is: repentance.

Touchy subject, I know. We spoke of it yesterday in church and about being caught in a "sorry cycle" - repeating the same methods of living and actions over and over again only to see the same results. I believe that was Einstein's definition of insanity.

Mark me guilty as charged then, with a plea of insanity. This past week has taught me a lot. Not only this past week, but the past few weeks. Everything that is spoken in or about my life has coincided with the message that God has brought me on a weekly and/or daily basis. It's truly humbling and amazing. I find myself believing that this hopefully means I am on my chosen path by God. Unfortunately, that path and its efforts have brought about pain, selfishness, and hurt from my past. I have broken down relationships and I have brought about things I lied to myself and others about. 

When these things surface my first reaction is a gut-twisting pain that thinks, "How did I live with myself? How did I allow myself to literally be an active part of someone's life with a role of destructing either them or myself?" How? The absence of God. 

Dr. Del Tackett teaches in The Truth Project that evil is merely the absence of God. Wow. Has that been unveiled to me boldly within the past weeks. I can't believe the things I use to put myself through, let alone others. I was about as selfish as they become.

So, how does this tie in to repentance you ask? Easy. You MUST repent in order to gain clarity and to clean your slate so that God may rewrite the instructions for your life on that very same one. I know, it's sounds so preachy. But it's a truth. One of the first Christian shirts I bought as a teenager from Mardel (anyone remember those stores?) was a parody of the Chuck Taylor logo and it said "Confess - All Sins - 1 John 1:9." Get it? Converse All-Star? Yes? Okay, moving on.

Repentance goes beyond truth. Repentance is something we must wait for, to resolve to past hurt that doesn't belong in our lives anymore. And once it has occurred, or at least have an attempt thrown at it, then the wait truly begins. Patience will unfold as you wait for the acceptance and regaining trust that you broke with yourself, others, and God. But that's the beauty! Though you hurt your Father, He wants to know the truth. He will not punish you because His son, our Savior, died for ALL of our sins upon the cross. He simply wants to have you with a clear conscience so that He may bring your clarity into the path He wants for you. See clearly down the path, and treasures and happiness will unfold in which you or I cannot begin to fathom.

I'm out. My brain and heart is spent. This journey is a constant struggle, but one that every heart must go through to truly belong to the One that can bring peace. Listen to the current music selection, you'll hear my heart.

Current Music: Sanctus Real's "We Need Each Other"; Track: "Whatever You're Doing (Something Heavenly)"

Hungry

Well folks. I know I haven't been updating as much as I'd like to. But there seems to be more important things for me to do. 

The last year. No kidding.

I've been feeling the crunch, much like most Americans. Words of worry haven't been grazing my tongue too badly, however. God is really giving me opportunities to make the best of my time, and by helping me to establish my own company. 

It's funny how hungry I am for experience. And yet, when presented with the opportunity to gain experience beyond comparable worth, and to my own accord and accomplishment criteria, I am scared. I know I shouldn't be, but I am. It's kind of frightening deciding to do something full-time that isn't making any cents (literally).

But I have decided to. TAP Music Group is now my full-time job. Yes, it's true.

My Monster job count, since I first signed up, within the past week.

I have applied for job after job after job. God does not want me here nor there. He wants me with TAP. It's true, otherwise I would have been snagged by some random company to be their slave for the next ________ year(s). I need income, true. But I also need to live out what is being presented to me.

My Sent Resumes folder for my email. Notice how many messages there are total (upper right hand corner of picture).

So TAP is on. Well, it already was. But now it's game-time. Full-time.

P.S. Sorry that no insight was offered for this post...just wanted to give an update. Thanks.

Current Music: Shai Hulud's "Misanthropy Pure"; Track: "Venomspreader"

Update

Thanks for tuning in and my apologies for not posting the last couple of days.

I have been very consumed with doing design work for TAP Music Group, as well as legal work. Now if only someone could pay me to do my own work...Hah.

Anyways, no thoughts for today. My mind is spent because of legal jargon.

So here's an entertaining picture:

Everyone needs a day at the beach.

Humor someone today.

Current Music: Shadow Figure's Self-Titled EP; Track: "Once I Was A Sailor"

Clarity

Today's word of wait is: clarity.

This one...or this one? Once again. Better...or worse?

It has been brought to my attention that my blogging efforts apparently aren't making much sense. Yes, I tend to ramble sometimes. And yes, I tend to stray off key from my core subject. So I apologize. My overall effort, though, is hopefully getting through.

My goal: I want at least one word, one sentence, or one thought to provoke you into thinking about things a little differently. Take, for example, the eye chart pictured above. In general, it's a bunch of letters that line up row-by-row and size-by-size. Overall, however, it produces a tool that's useful for every day practice. 

I know that there's a big picture to everyone (and apparently it scrambles some people's minds), but really what I want you to walk away from your computer screens with is even a glimmer of positivity and hope - be it one word, sentence, verse, or thought. It's all about the "particulars" lining up with the "universal" ideas (thank "The Truth Project" and Dr. Del Tackett for confusing you on that subject, not me).

You see, every day that goes by is a blur. Lining up the particulars (the every day moments that make up your day and/or life) and the universal ideas (the fact that it's just "another day" to live through) is difficult living at the speed the world lives in, much like I spoke of yesterday. Not seeing how the day is made up, or what it is made of, allows us to miss the important details of existence. This is when we need clarity provoked in our lives. God utilizes events in your life to clarify details of what He'd like for you to do.

Don't miss them. Don't miss my point. And if I allow you to miss it, that's my failure. So I only hope and pray that I type the right thoughts, to form the right phrases, in the right order.

I will indeed work on my clarity, just remember to work on yours.

G'night.

Current Music: Jeff Cyrus/Opie Howard's Untitled; Track: "All You"

Consider The Ravens Indeed

God works fast. Don't worry about competition, much less anything else.

Just received this is in an email:

Luke 12:22-25 - Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. Life is more than food, and the body more than clothes. Consider the ravens: they do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds! Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?

Wow. 

Current Music: The Arcade Fire's "Funeral"; Track: "Neighborhood #3 (Power Out)"

Mobility

Today's word of wait is: mobility.

It takes keen senses and cat-like reflexes to survive in this world anymore. Everything changes so rapidly. Commercial to commercial: 30 seconds. Download music: less than 3 minutes. Drive-thru orders: under 1 minute. The list goes on and on. Society nowadays doesn't slow down for you, it expects you to speed up.

Therefore, mobility is key. And not necessarily mobility to move or advance yourself in the quickest way possible, but rather the smartest. Mobility, though meant for fast transitions, involves the act of waiting and a great deal of patience. You have to wait for the signals for the right time to move. Ever heard that saying that it's all about the right time at the right place? Well, I'm finding it to be more true as each day passes.

That's not to say that there shouldn't be any weight added to having a sharp intellect and valuable education (whether formal or informal), it's meant to say that I believe it is a combination of these things that truly make mobility an easier tool to utilize. You obviously have to know which routes to use wisely in order to get where you need to be. As Dr. Rich Barnet once said, "Any map will get you there if you don't know where you're going."

So you're still worried about competing with other individuals or business and thinking others might get to the same destination before you. One: You're assuming. Don't do that. It takes a lot of time out of focusing positive efforts on reaching your goal. Two: If you utilize all your assets (knowledge, contacts, etc.) your efforts will mobilize you more rapidly. 

Setting up TAP Music Group and it's structure was a tedious task for myself and James, and it's ever ongoing. In my opinion, no one should ever stop learning in this world - that's truly what slows you down.

In the case of how God interprets mobility, God uses you to move in ways that prosper His kingdom. I know some critics might think, "Hmm. That's kind of selfish. And 'Christians' are supposed to be generous...what gives?" God gives all of us talents to mobilize His kingdom, true. But it is a mutually-beneficial relationship. The blessings that fall on you because of choosing God as your guide can reap rewards you've never seen. 

In the end, it's all about paths. Which path you choose creates ample opportunities or obstacles for true prosperity. Mobilizing your ideas, goals, relationships, and other aspects of your professional or personal life may not be as haste as you would like, but if done correctly, the rewards will be greater.

Think of it this way, what mobilizes you? What advantage do you have that can be counted as your goodwill? Take this and use it in a passionate way that generates positive outcomes - like I spoke of yesterday. Good luck.

Current Music: Farewell Fighter's Self-Titled EP; Track: "Anthem West"

P.S. I'm currently attending evangelical classes that are a part of "The Truth Project" put together by Dr. Del Tackett. A lot of the thought process and theory that I learn from those classes will be practiced here. It's mind-blowing stuff.